One wonders why

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It was the appearance of this in the local press that left me wondering whether statisticians have become disembodied heads.

It was the appearance of this in the local press that left me wondering whether statisticians have become disembodied heads.

Whilst Coco has every sympathy for those who suffer from the disease of the body which we know as diabetes, Coco has little sympathy for those statisticians who though they are irrefragable in the use of the art to which they are devoted, show little or perhaps even no common sense.

The reporter who brought this matter to his attention does however at least stand one step of contempt above the reporter who recently published an article about the discovery of a decapitated head. Well, Coco has never seen nor even heard of such a thing, have you? Decapitated bodies are not uncommon, as are perhaps dismembered ones, but decapitated heads? It seems as unlikely as a dismembered arm. Perhaps the real intention was to say scalped head, you might ask, but no, the find was of a head, a whole head. One can however understand the dilemma of the reporter, this was clearly a head alone, not attached to any body, but to call it a disembodied head would hardly have conveyed the right impression, and in any event, a disembodied something would be rather difficult to find, given that that which is disembodied no longer has a material presence in this universe. Perhaps they really meant decapacitated, but shied away from a word which may only have reflected back upon themselves.

Coco was unable to find a complete copy of the article online, but you may read the article for yourself here:

One can hardly blame the reporter, poor chap, what does a reporter know about statistics? That question is rhetorical, in case it needs to be said. Coco is not unaware that there may be reporters who have had a good, and far better than Coco’s, grounding in such. But one is left wondering whether or not common sense has been applied.

It does not take much effort to see that the statistical result of two and a half times more likely is incorrect, whatever the results of the statistical analysis might yield. Coco would like to suggest that the answer is really much more like one hundred percent more likely, which is to say almost certainly going to be the case, if not actually in reality, without even the need to apply any statistical analysis at all. For it seems so very clear to Coco that although most young people die old, and many young people have died young, it is impossible that anyone who is old shall die young. Old people always die old. So then, let us read again what the article suggested: The risk of early death was 2,5 times greater for those diagnosed before 40 compared with those diagnosed after 60.

That is a wonderfully incredible statement. Please allow Coco to break it apart. In order to be able to say that one thing is greater than another we need to know, if not the absolute magnitude of the two things, the relative magnitude. In this case we are talking about a comparison of the level of risk. So we should have some idea of the level of risk faced by the two gorups, those who are under forty and those who are over sixty. Now perhaps first we should simplify the examination by removing from it the complicating factor of type 2 diabetes, and we shall adjust, if necessary, our findings later for that omission. We shall add a more general comment about mortality also.

So then we must determine what is the risk of dying young for a forty year old and for a sixty year old? Now Coco is not skilled in the arts of the actuary, but it does not seem unlikely to think that although a forty year old may die young, a sixty year old will never die young. Though if someone thinks that a sixty year old may die young, then it is likely that they have discovered the elixir of life for which the alchemists of yore vainly sought for centuries. Perhaps they would care to share their secret with Coco, or at least publish their results subject to peer review and set up production and marketing companies for the benefit of wider mankind. Oh, Coco apologises, you may have noticed, the mention of statistics does rather cause Coco to stray and indulge in flights of fantasy, unlike Leonardo of course who was the precursor of our own* Wright brothers..

So then, back to the point, for the sake of clarity and being able to do some calculations, without suggesting that the numbers are correct, let us say that the risk of dying young at age forty is 1% of 4‰. We have already said that there is no risk that a person diagnosed at age sixty will die young, such a thing is impossible, therefore the risk of dying young for this group is 0% of 4‰. We may then restate the point in the article as The risk of early death was 1%/0% times greater for those diagnosed before 40 compared with those diagnosed after 60.

Now all we need is a mathematician who can tell us how we can reduce the ratio 1:0 to a number that we shall understand. Coco thinks that it means this: The risk of early death was infinitely greater for those diagnosed before 40 compared with those diagnosed after 60.

This can be put in an even more blunt manner that the research suggested that it was certain that those who were diagnosed before 40 would succumb to an early death, whereas those who were diagnosed after age sixty would die, as expected, old. Coco remains unconvinced of the veracity of this argument, as it is clear that not all who are disagnosed before forty die young, some will die old. However, the mathematics suggests it, and incidently it would make no difference what the actual level of risk was for a forty year old (and we therefore do not need to enter a correction for the diagnosis or otherwise of the condition of type 2 diabetes), the result would always be certain, just as the statistics suggests that the ratio is 2.4.

Coco suggests that one should perhaps also note on the matter of increasing mortality with age, that if at age sixty you are discovered to have a condition which reduced life expectancy to about twenty years then at sixty when life expectancy is less than twenty years, it is perhaps of no great concern. You are likely to have been taken before the condition takes you. If however you are discovered to have this condition when you are only forty years of age, when your life expectancy may have been up to forty years, then you would view the condition in a different way and perhaps feel more threatened by it. The discovery of the condition for a forty year old increases the expectation of mortality significantly, but in a sixty year old hardly at all.

Given the uncertainty that this all provides, should we not be glad that there is one who knows all things and declares to us: ‘I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me, though he die shall live’ John 11:25. Those who trust the Lord Jesus Christ need not fear. Diabetes may shorten your life on this earth now, but he will raise us up again at the last day to live on a new earth in new bodies where there shall be no more death, from any cause, nor crying, nor tears, but all shall live in love and harmony with him and with one another.

*Much like Formosa, we are waiting for the colonies on the mainland of the American continent to acknowledge their lawful and ancestral ruler.
No doubt the erudite and skilled shall find much worthy of contempt in this the article of Coco, but Coco would wish to remind such that erudition, skill and facts should not be allowed to spoil a good story as long as it is properly recognised that it is indeed a good story.

One wonders why

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It was the appearance of this in the local press that reminded me of a report from elsewhere that left me wondering why.

The story referenced above is devastating in the approach taken to hygiene in the kitchen but these give you reason to wonder.

I was reminded of a report from France. The restaurant, I shall not mention its name for reasons of good etiquette and not to be thought to rejoice over the ill-fortune of others, had been established since the days of the third republic and was renowned for the quality and voluptious nature of its fare. Only the best and the good would eat there, the rest would visit perhaps for a small drink, but rarely two, being quite wary of the generous sums afforded by its ménu.

As with all such establishments they were inevitably subject to an inspection by the local authorities.

After the first inspection the Inspectateuse imposed an order of Désistament. The restaurant quite naturally refused to comply with this order as it had not changed its behaviour since inception and the previous inspections had not had any reason to complain. We know however that standards do change and over time more is expected of businesses. One could say that the law becomes stricter, but it is perhaps society’s expectations that change.

Finding that the order of Désistement had been ignored the Inspectateuse indicated that the matter would be brought before the Officeur de Jurisprudence. The restaurateur appealed to the Conciliateur, who merely opined that had the matter been brought before him before an order to appear before the Officeur had been made he would of course have heard the matter, but in the circumstances his hands were tied unless any further order were made by the Officeur to bring the matter before him.

The Inspectateuse was unimpressed by the efforts of the Restauratuer to avoid justice and his apparantly careless attitude to both the order and now the appearance in the Court de Jurisprudence and prepared her case carefully. She would not as the English would say over egg the pudding but merely refer to some relatively straight forward breaches of standards.

The appearance before the Haut Magistrat did not go well. The Restaurateur had expected the petition of the parquet to be thrown out and had not prepared to take part in the débat contradictoire. This to was his great loss, and it would have been a better outcome for him if he had simply not appeared at all. The fine would be €20k. It was a significant sum, but not unaffordable. The Restaurateur consoled himself that the publicity surrounding the case would neither be detrimental to his honour nor to his business.

He indicated that he would wish the matter to be heard by the Court de Cassation, but in the meantime it would of course be necessary to pay the fine.

The court unusually had not ordered the destruction of the offending items of his victualry, and so he delivered one up to the hands of a famous auction house, who regularly held proceedings in Paris and New York for the disposition of such items. Indeed the matter quite exceeded everyone’s expecations. There was significant excitement that an unopened bottle of Napoleon III brandy was going on sale. There was no question of the authenticity of the wine as it had been in the hands of the restuarant since it had been purchased from a small shop in the Rue de Valois. It and several others had been in the safe keeping of the proprietors ever since.

The price in the auction rose quickly beyond the reserve but slowed as the hoped for target approached. Then at €22,500 the bidding tailed off until there were only two who tipped each other €10 at a time. The auctioneer was unhappy with this state of affairs and without denying that he would continue for as long as they wished to do so, asked if one of them would not mind bidding up €500 to put the other out of his misery. Three bids later there was silence. €24,090 became the hammer price. The fine was paid and the small surplus used to thank the Inspectateuse and the Haut Magistrat for their work.

It was over dinner that evening that the Restauratuer learned that the Haut Magistrat had himself been the proud owner of a bottle of Napolean III brandy. It had served him well for twenty years being an excellent mouthwash he said after dinner, the liquor had long since been spent, since when he had sought to acquire a Napoleon III brandy for the kitchen of the Court, but no-one was willing to sell any even if any were available. Had he been to the auction the Restauratuer enquired? It would not have been proper for the Haut Magistrat to reply, but he was able to confirm the that kitchen at the Court did now have in its inventory such a thing.

Then a second report came to light. In the East End a new restaurant had been established by two individuals in partnership to celebrate the British diet in the years 1939 to 1945. The ingredients for the meals were sourced from small farms in Lincolnshire, the Fens and north Wales. The farms agreed to ensure that only war time methods would be used for this produce, so far as was consistent with modern standards of hygiene. And the owners sent out notes as far and wide as possible to obtain recipes and other items that might be of use or for display. To their surprise they found that many had kept old tins and packets, as well as ration cards, which were falling now into the hands of the house clearance experts. This they thought could be good for his business, so they contracted to take up tinned and bottled victuals.

Then came the inspection. They had not actually used any of these items in their kitchens though should guests wish to have any they were not unwilling to sell tins of ham, spam, corned beef etc or jars of pickled onions etc to them.

No other problems arose on the inspection, but that apparently that broke all of the rules. There was out of date food on his shelves and it had to go. Unless they wished to be taken to court something must be done about it. There was also the threat that they would be closed down if they did not act.

This was unwelcome news for the proprietors, but they said they would give serious consideration to the matter and how to deal with it. The following day one of the owners rang the officers and informed them that as the partnership had been dissolved he would close the restaurant with immediate effect for two days. It would be reopened, under new ownership, on the Friday of that week, should they wish to reinspect.

On the Friday the inspectors came. All was well. The offending items had been removed. But the restaurant was slightly smaller than on their first visit. Ah yes, the owner explained. We had to partition some of the restaurant off in order to accommodate a small boutique vendor of objets d’art. The gentlemen had approached them, being a specialist in the second great war, with the idea of a curiosity shop next door to the restaurant. He thought it would be a most appropriate situation in which to be located, but had had difficulty in obtaining the premises either side, would they help?

It was then that the inspectors saw an new item on the wall, which was not out of place in most eating establishments in public places, but unusual in a place like this: Guests are reminded that only food purchased in the premises may be consumed in this restaurant. We will however make an exception for those who can prove that their victuals were processed before 1950, and in common with unlicensed restaurants we shall make a caulkage(sic!) charge for those who wish to avail themselves of this exception.

Hastening outside the inspectors did indeed find a new boutique, which sold all manner of war time memorabilia, but whose stock for the most part consisted of tins, bottles and jars. All of them were labelled: Objets d’art – not for human consumption. And behind the counter, the restauratuer’s former partner, who welcomed them and asked them to browse and perhaps purchase if they were willing.

Living sacrifice

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Thinking about what Paul had said the other day…

I was thinking one day about what Paul had said in his letter to the Romans in the section we call chapter 12, which may be read at Bible Gateway:

I encourage you brethren in the light of the mercy of God to bring your bodies as living sacrifices, holy, well-pleasing to God, which is your reasonable service.

I was puzzling over the translation of the words reasonable service, which some translate as spiritual worship. How could they get this translation out of the words that Paul used? Apparently it is all down to Chrysostom, who lived much closer to Paul than we do of course, but I still fail to see it. I must confess however that on the surface it appears to be a better thing to say than reasonable service. Who would not want to offer to God spiritual worship? After all, did not Jesus say to the woman at the well in Samaria: the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshippers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for the Father is seeking such to worship him. God is Spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth. John 4:23-24 NKJV

Paul was very careful with his words and not unwilling to coin his own where the meaning would be exact and, literally here, quite cutting: κατατομην, so when he used λογικην λατρειαν was he also not being precise? There are other perfectly good words for spirit (πνευμα) and worship (προσκυνεω), which Paul did not use. Why then would we think to ourselves that he meant otherwise than he actually said?.

So then coming back, worship (προσκυνεω) is not the word Paul uses. He uses a different word: λατρειαν. This is nothing to do with what you might think – that is a Latin word, this one is Greek. I looked it up. The Lord used the same word when speaking to his disciples: whoever kills you will think that he offers God service John 16:2 – or he brings a service to God. Surely, that word must have cut Paul, for he used to think in that way himself. Did he indeed have those words of the Lord in mind when he wrote this? Look, he says, I was wrong. It is not service to offer their dead bodies to God, but to offer yourselves as living sacrifices – THEREFORE, he says, that is your reasonable, that is your logical service. That is what you must conclude having read so much in this letter to the Romans, you must now reach this conclusion that this is your reasonable service. But note, it is not worship. This same word is used in Revelation 7:15 of those who serve before the throne of God day and night. In Old Testament terms these are those who do all of the ‘ordinary’ jobs around the temple in order that the temple may function as a temple. When they fall to worship the other word proskuneo is used (Rev 4:10). The word used here in Romans 12:1, which some of our translations render worship in fact only refers to the service, the acts, the deeds, the things we do which are a part of worship.

Is this not wonderful? There are people around today who think in just the same way that Saul did. They think that they offer service to God by killing the servants of Jesus Christ. Just as an aside, surely if their god were not impotent he would not need their help to do this? But to come back to the point, the wonderful thing is that God no longer wants dead sacrifices – sheep, goats and the like – he wants you a living sacrifice to live your life out to the glory of his name by the power of the Holy Spirit in name of the Lord Jesus Christ. Now that is something worth living for.

There was something else interesting about Paul which I had not noticed. Perhaps a failure to put two and two together on my part. Our pastor was speaking on the words from the same letter to the Romans: What shall we say then? Is the law sin? Certainly not! On the contrary, I would not have known sin except through the law. For I would not have known covetousness unless the law had said, ‘You shall not covet.’ But sin, taking opportunity by the commandment, produced in me all manner of evil desire. For apart from the law sin was dead. I was alive once without the law, but when the commandment came, sin revived and I died. And the commandment, which was to bring life, I found to bring death. For sin, taking occasion by the commandment, deceived me, and by it killed me. Therefore the law is holy, and the commandment holy and just and good. Romans 7:7-12 NKJV

Here Paul tells us that the sin that caught him out was covetousness. He was able to say, and I am quite sure that there were enough people who knew him who would not let him get away with it if it were not true that he was concerning the righteousness which is in the law, blameless. Philippians 3:6.

Now a young man once came to Jesus and went away with a very heavy heart. This young man wanted to know how to obtain eternal life: ‘Good Teacher, what good thing shall I do that I may have eternal life?” So Jesus said to him, ‘Why do you call me good? No one is good but One, that is, God. But if you want to enter into life, keep the commandments.’ He said to him, ‘Which ones?’ Jesus said, ‘You shall not murder; you shall not commit adultery; you shall not steal; you shall not bear false witness; honour your father and your mother and you shall love your neighbour as yourself.’ The young man said to him, ‘All these things I have kept from my youth. What do I still lack?’ Jesus said to him, ‘If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.’ But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions. Matthew 19:16-22 NKJV

Jesus deliberately left out ‘you shall not covet‘. You see although the young man was rich, and he had no need of anything, he coveted what he had. You can see from his response that he was not willing to share it. He coveted it for himself. Is it any wonder that such a young man would not many years later be found persecuting the followers of Jesus Christ. He wanted to establish his own righteousness by keeping the law, but the harder he tried the more the command ‘you shall not covet‘ stuck in his throat and like a rabid dog it would not leave him alone. He railed against it. He wanted his own righteousness, but he could not get it. And he hated those who claimed that Jesus had offered himself as a sacrifice to fulfill and replace all of the law. Now they talked about Jesus having fulfilled the law for them. Saul would have none of it. It was in his mind blasphemy, but in reality he knew. He could not avoid the force of the commandment which said ‘you shall not covet‘.

Then one day the Lord met him. Instead of offering service to God by forcing the followers of Jesus Christ to apostacise, he offered himself as a living sacrifice to God and discovered what reasonable service to God was.

May you also discover what it is to serve the Lord as Paul did.

Think about it.

Then Saul, still breathing threats and murder against the disciples of the Lord, went to the high priest and asked letters from him to the synagogues of Damascus, so that if he found any who were of the Way, whether men or women, he might bring them bound to Jerusalem.

As he journeyed he came near Damascus, and suddenly a light shone around him from heaven. Then he fell to the ground, and heard a voice saying to him, ‘Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting me?’ And he said, ‘Who are you, Lord?’ Then the Lord said, ‘I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting. It is hard for you to kick against the goads.’ So he, trembling and astonished, said, ‘Lord, what do you want me to do?’ Then the Lord said to him, ‘Arise and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.’ And the men who journeyed with him stood speechless, hearing a voice but seeing no one. Then Saul arose from the ground, and when his eyes were opened he saw no one. But they led him by the hand and brought him into Damascus. And he was three days without sight, and neither ate nor drank.

Now there was a certain disciple at Damascus named Ananias; and to him the Lord said in a vision, ‘Ananias.’And he said, ‘Here I am, Lord.’ So the Lord said to him, ‘Arise and go to the street called Straight, and inquire at the house of Judas for one called Saul of Tarsus, for behold, he is praying. And in a vision he has seen a man named Ananias coming in and putting his hand on him, so that he might receive his sight.’ Then Ananias answered, ‘Lord, I have heard from many about this man, how much harm he has done to your saints in Jerusalem. And here he has authority from the chief priests to bind all who call on your name.’ But the Lord said to him, “Go, for he is a chosen vessel of mine to bear my name before Gentiles, kings, and the children of Israel. For I will show him how many things he must suffer for my name’s sake.’

And Ananias went his way and entered the house; and laying his hands on him he said, ‘Brother Saul, the Lord Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you came, has sent me that you may receive your sight and be filled with the Holy Spirit.’ Immediately there fell from his eyes something like scales, and he received his sight at once; and he arose and was baptized. So when he had received food, he was strengthened. Then Saul spent some days with the disciples at Damascus.

Immediately he preached the Christ in the synagogues, that he is the Son of God. Acts 9:1-20 NKJV

The use of the rainbow

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saw that the rainbow had become quite popular…

I noticed a rainbow and remembered what the Lord had said to Noah (you can read about more it here or at Bible Gateway):

I set my rainbow in the cloud, and it shall be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth. It shall be, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the rainbow shall be seen in the cloud; and I will remember my covenant which is between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; the waters shall never again become a flood to destroy all flesh.

The rainbow is a sign of great comfort to us, for God says that when he sees it he will remember his covenant, and we may know that he will not destroy the world again by water, but it is also a sign of great terror, for as Peter reminds us in his second letter we forget that the earth of old was destroyed by the flood. The rainbow reminds us of this, and tells us that our Lord Jesus is coming again, and that though this world will not be destroyed by a flood, it will perish in fire. He will keep his promise to come back. In the meantime we must yield to him, who, like the ark that Noah built was the only thing that could save from the flood, he is the only one who can save us from this fire.

So think about it.

⁸Then God spoke to Noah and to his sons with him, saying: ⁹And as for Me, behold, I establish My covenant with you and with your descendants after you, ¹⁰and with every living creature that is with you: the birds, the cattle, and every beast of the earth with you, of all that go out of the ark, every beast of the earth. ¹¹Thus I establish My covenant with you: Never again shall all flesh be cut off by the waters of the flood; never again shall there be a flood to destroy the earth.

¹²And God said: This is the sign of the covenant which I make between Me and you, and every living creature that is with you, for perpetual generations: ¹³I set My rainbow in the cloud, and it shall be for the sign of the covenant between Me and the earth. ¹⁴It shall be, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the rainbow shall be seen in the cloud; ¹⁵and I will remember My covenant which is between Me and you and every living creature of all flesh; the waters shall never again become a flood to destroy all flesh. ¹⁶The rainbow shall be in the cloud, and I will look on it to remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is on the earth. ¹⁷And God said to Noah, This is the sign of the covenant which I have established between Me and all flesh that is on the earth.

UnFree

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A curious miscarriage

Not free to go

It was Monday morning, the weekend had been longer and more tedious than usual, and Norbert was preparing to leave for the office, when there was a knock at the door. Norbert was surprised to find Jeremy the local bobby outside.

Good morning, Jerry. What brings you here today?

I am very sorry, sir, but I must take you away to a place of confinement where you will remain for an indefinite period.

I don’t understand, are you saying that you are taking me to gaol?

Yes, sir, that is what I must do. You were condemned by the Court yesterday, and I have been instructed to escort you to the lawful place of confinement.

I know you must do your work, Jerry, but perhaps you would enlighten me. For what have I been condemned?

I have not been told, sir. I am aware that your statement was presented to the court, one witness was called and then came the judgement, but I was not permitted to enter to courtroom.

May I have a few moments to pack a bag? Please come in and take a seat. I shall not be long.

As he packed, Norbert reflected upon the situation. He had been called into the station several weeks ago to give an account of his movements on a particular day in December. He thought carefully about what he had said in that document. He had been out of town all of that week on business, and could think of nothing in it that could give rise to what was now taking place. He mused thoughtfully, as the absurdity of the situation pressed home upon him. Here he was about to be committed to a place of confinement on the judgement of a court at a hearing of which he had no knowledge. He supposed that had he troubled himself to go to the court every day, he would have seen his name on the list of cases to be heard: Person or persons unknown v Norbert Smith Defendant 1230 Room B, he imagined to himself. What had been said about him? Why had he not received a call to attend the hearing and reply to his accusers?

He resigned himself to his fate. He remembered that the wise man said: the first to present his case seems right, till another comes forward and questions him. (Proverbs 18:17)

Coco © 2015

Coco wonders how many of us feel a little bit like Norbert. There are flaws in many processes which would not be permitted in the legal process in a liberal state. And if you wonder why Coco wrote this, it is quite simple, there are two reasons. Firstly, the document, which claims to be an assessment, appears to be empty. Nothing has been said, so there is nothing to which a reply can be given. And secondly, there has been no process meeting with the preparer of the document, but only an informal chat with the one who has been interposed between Coco and the Assessor. It is of course nothing less than is expected to happen or not happen however you may wish to look at it.

[Coco attempts to make some changes and add comments to the document, and then having second thoughts to remove them.]

“Ah, but how strange, it seems not to be possible to remove comments, even draft comments, after they have been saved….ah well I shall post the whole thing again with the correction…”

[It is for this reason that the first related tale finds its way into the document. Then there is a question to which an answer must be given, but the only answer available is not the answer which Coco either wished to give or would have been true if given]

“It would seem that there is only one possible answer to the question. HMRC require non trading partnerships who wish to file on-line and also to complete the additional information box, which is intended only for trade use, to pretend that they are trading partnerships (ie to lie) and to declare that the type of trade is NO TRADE. In the light of this and in the same spirit I have selected the only option available.“

[Coco is left as perplexed as Norbert was at the process which led to his gaoling, but without having to face the same consequences.]

η αυτοκτονια του η-αυ

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The original thought, which was not original to me, was that the chapter would open with the words:

   As Eeyore slipped his neck into the noose…

But upon further reflection it was apparent that such an opening would raise many questions which, in consideration of the possible consequences of Eeyore’s action would have been of necessity left unanswered. It was therefore considered that a more open approach to the situation in which we found Eeyore would provide the appropriate opportuntities to speak about, to explore and to expose the context in which the most unfortunate incident arose:

It was a far brighter and sunnier morn than that to which the inhabitants of the Hundred Acre wood were accustomed. Such a morn as this was rarely seen. The butterflies fluttered by, and the bees hummed busily as they gathered the nectar and pollens which, by and by, would be turned into the honey that our dear friend Pooh loved to use to suage his voracious appetite.

Piglet and Roo were playing together going deeper and deeper into the wood towards the house in which Eeyore lived. They were enjoying the warm fresh air of the forest as it mingled with the aromas of a thousand fresh flowers.

All at once they found a rope hanging from a tree.

A swing, cried Roo and ran towards it as fast as he could, which was much faster than most of the other animals could run.

Wait for me-eee! cried Piglet, who then remembered that it might be Owl’s door bell. Be careful! he shouted, but it was too late, Roo was swinging on the rope for all his might, and so high that Piglet thought he might lose him in the tops of the trees.

This was not Owl’s rope then, but if it did not belong to Owl, to whom did it belong? Piglet tried to think very hard.

Just then Eeyore appeared walking as he does slowly into the clearing where Roo was swinging wildly from the rope.

What are you two doing with MY rope, Eeyore asked.

Your rope, Eeyore?, they replied.

Yes, my rope. I left it there hoping someone might come along and be so kind, not that I suppose some one would be so kind, – taking the end of the rope between his teeth, for Roo had stopped swinging and was listening both intently and very excitedly – and he continued: be so kind as to help me tie a k-not in it.

Tie a what in it?, they both asked wondering what a k-not was.

A k-not, that is what I said, didn’t I? Eeyore replied in his inimitable way.

Yes, but why? And how?, Piglet wondered out loud.

I can’t show you how, these hooves and teeth are simply not up to the job, not up to the job you know. It is the missing opposable thumb that is the problem. But I can tell you how to do it. Owl told me. It will make a better swing if we put a loop in it.

Oh! let’s do it then, said Piglet full of excitement.

Piglet and Roo worked together listening carefully to Eeyore’s instructions. It was not so easy, and sometimes they had to undo what they had done in order to do it again.

But eventually they completed the work and when they had finished, Eeyore asked them to find something round to put inside the loop so that it would keep its shape.

That’s a good idea, said Piglet, and he trotted off to do so with Roo bouncing after him. On the way they met Kanga who announced that it really was time for Roo to go to bed.

But, but, but we have to find something for Eeyore, they protested, and proceeded to tell Kanga all about the day’s events.

We shall see about that then, Kanga replied, Christopher Robin will surely know what is needed and have the right sort of Special Equipment. We shall go to find him, but no more than half an hour mind, and then it is to bed.

They went to find Christopher Robin.

Meanwhile, Eeyore had been examining the knot that Piglet and Roo had put together in the rope.

He lifted his head and pulled the knot gently with his teeth. Yes it slipped quite nicely, just as Owl had told him that it would. Splendid, he thought to himself, it is the very thing that I need, as if I would need anything, and to call it splendid hardly describes its purpose well, but then what could.

Now he took hold of the rope above the knot and slowly climbed with it up the nearby bank. He had very carefully made sure that that would be possible to do that with the rope before our two little friends arrived.

As he reached the top of the rise, he stopped. A dark cloud passed by the sun, and for a moment Eeyore thought it might rain. A fitting end, he said to himself in the very heavy way that only Eeyore can say things, especially when he says them to himself.

He paused for a moment to reflect. There is nothing for it, he said in his deep throated voice. Then as Eeyore slipped his neck into the noose that Piglet and Roo had carefully prepared for him, Christopher Robin ran into the clearing. Eeyore! he cried out, I have just the thing. This will stop the knot from slip….

All was quiet in the clearing

*

as Eeyore swang happily in the new swing.

* But what happened in the gap? There are of course two, and only two, possible ways in which to fill this gap. The one you choose will depend upon your predilection for Eeyore and your own predisposition of course. So which ending will you choose?

All was quiet in the clearing. Christopher Robin looked on helplessly and as hopelessly as Eeyore, until that moment, had thought things were. The cloud had passed by, and the butterflies continued to flutter by and the bees continued to hum, as Eeyore swang happily in the new swing.

Or,

All was quiet in the clearing but what a surprise! Eeyore landed in Christopher Robin’s outstretched hands. O! Eeyore, he cried, I do love you. Giving him a great big hug, he placed him on the ground and fitted the swing with its Special Equipment, then carefully placing Eeyore back into the swing gave him a gentle push. That will be much more comfortable for you now, Eeyore, he smiled.

Kanga, Roo and Piglet, who had been left behind by Christopher Robin, then arrived at and entered the clearing just as Eeyore swang happily in the new swing.

Taxology?

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If you are a taxologist, or even if you are not
then this will appeal to your sense of injustice.
Do not forget to do your research first…..read the story below.

Before Coco makes any, as perhaps some would interpret it, apositive comments, do not think that Coco is not unaware that languages change in their construction, grammar and syntax, and that words change their meaning, a phenomena to which many of the so-called false cousins of the European languages will be very willing to attest. So his comments may be understood to be quite miserable, but they are certainly, Coco says with not with unalloyed hope, but not hype, not intended to be misérable. For this reason it is very important that we have a proper understanding of words and their use, it is for this reason that every one of us carries within him a taxonomy by which we classify words so that we know which set of words are appropriate at any particular time. Parts of our taxonomic classification, if that is not a tautological repetition of the same conceptual idea, will indicate to us that certain classes of words are appropriate in one circumstance; for example, language may not be used in the discussions that take place in the nursery between a mother and her child, which would not be out of place in the context of seeking a negotiated settlement of certain difficulties which may have arisen as a consequence of a perceived, or perhaps even putative, breach of contract, even though the purpose of the use of the language in both cases is propitiatory, which is to say that in its intention it seeks to bring about the reconciliation of two estranged parties.

So to come to the point of my post, if it were not for its progeny Coco would not have believed it possible for this to have been suggested by R*****s. Now although Webster’s is not his favourite dictionary, it behoves Coco to avoid, or should that be evade, perhaps even eschew the use of a British dictionary in this context, and Coco does happen to have a copy of an authorised British printing of the 1924 edition, which rather helpfully warns him that should it be found in his possession after emigrating to Australia it will be liable to confiscation.

Turning to page 2118 in the second volume we find in the footnotes this entry

The main entry on the following page then provides a clear definition of the word under discussion.

Coco is not entirely sure how well the photographs will turn out here, so here is a transcription for the two root words:

tax-ol´o-gy (tăk-sŏl´ṓ-jĭ),n. [Gr. τάξις arrangement + -logy.] Taxonomy.

tax-on´o-my ({tăk-sŏn´ṓ}-mĭ), n. [Gr. τάξις arrangement, order + νομος a law.] Classification; esp., classification of animals and plants according to their natural relationships; also, the laws and principles of such classification.

The meanings of the derived terms; taxonomist, taxonomic, taxonomical, taxonomically, and those derived from the synonym taxology, need no further explanation.

Coco will draw no conclusion, but rather leave the reader to draw his own.

By the way Coco too is a taxologist in the way that he thinks about and understands tax, but his taxological understanding and methods do not end there. The use of taxology is important in our approach to many different aspects of knowledge without which we would remain in extreme ignorance of the world around us. So, taxology is important to us in our understanding of who God is, the universe, life and everything. Of course, taxology is not itself a substitute for these things. It merely provides a framework for us within which we may build our understanding and hope to build up our understanding of these things.

The Story

{A} monumental discovery became evident after plenty of sleuthing. A senior director of marketing for the corporate business, and her team recruited countless players: leaders across the industry, numerous accounting firms, and even the IRS. Persona work cut through a jungle of questions. Suddenly the uncertainty dissipated. What remained was a clear gap in the market…and the team seized upon this opportunity to address the need for a personality.

We fill that gap as the industry’s trusted partner in tax technology. {The} team knew it was time to take ownership of our prestigious status and create a campaign with which the customers identified.

And the Taxologist was born.

Taxologist noun [taks-ol-uh-jist]: a tax professional that excels in the use of technology to maximize tax function effectiveness.

How does one identify this breed of professional? It’s simple, really: they are typically tax managers or directors, engineers of change that operate as a driving force for new tax technology. By challenging the status quo of the tax department, they have moved away from Excel and toward total management of their professional skillsets using the utmost technological efficiency.

The big word in the Taxologist campaign is {Taxological}. {Taxology} transforms today’s tax professionals into Taxologists. It empowers them – which, as eye-opening persona work reveals, is important for this customer.

“[The campaign] has a personal feel to it. [The customers] are unique characters,” A said.

Her team’s extensive persona work greatly shaped the Taxologist campaign. By analyzing the buyers’ behavio[u]rs(sic!) and psychology, they gained eye-opening results that helped them better anticipate the content they desire to see and better understand their current situation. The team learned that these customers sometimes don’t hear enough accolades though they’re essential operators of tax processes. They often work as behind-the-scenes players in the company, but their work is crucial to their business. The Taxologist campaign is a personal way to reward them and make them feel special. Now we’re speaking their language.

{Taxology} noun [wuhn-sohrs]: the art, science, and skill of combining tax with technology to gain efficiency across the tax lifecycle. It transforms today’s tax professionals into Taxologists.

Taxology is the tool that fills the gap in the industry for a tax technology leader. The Taxologist campaign is what we’ve crafted to get the customers excited about the technology they utilize and their pivotal roles in the industry. With this identity, they can feel confident about the change they’re enacting. It is okay to embrace technology and we are their partner in that.

The Taxologist campaign will invade and conquer using a broad range of materials. Currently….

Advertising campaign by {name redacted} media group

Names have been redacted both to protect the innocent and to not promote the advertising further.

Transport?

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If you are a tube enthusiast, or even if you are not:

Scene 1

If you enjoy travelling on the tube, but especially if you do not read on….

It had been a long and a wearying day, All the particles were feeling quite low and certainly less energetic than usual. A bunch of electrons arrived on the platform at pretty much the same time as a bunch of photons, so the platform was quite full. The train pulled in. There seemed to be plenty of room. True there were some rather large neutrons and several terribly attractive protons, but not so many that they should have been the cause of a problem.

The doors opened. The electrons stood, as only electrons could, looking at each other in that inimitably negative way in astonishment. Perplexed, they listened again: Will all particles use all available doors!

The train started to move. They watched as the train departed with all photons safely on board.

Scene 2

More photons descended to the platform to join our beleaguered electrons. Shortly, a second train, which was rather more crowded than the first arrived.

The announcer blared out his instructions: Please move down the carriages, and will particles please use all available space!

Our poor friends, for we are beginning to get to know them quite well now, were no less confused by this message than by the first. How? How could they? Those rather large neutrons could make a pretty good attempt at it, but we? How can we do that.

The train pulled away. The electrons watched in dismay as the train departed with all photons safely on board.

Scene 3

Niels Bohr descended to the platform to join our now very excited and quite heated electrons. Shortly, a third train, which was completely packed arrived.

The announcer blared out his instructions: Please allow particles off the train before boarding! Use all available doors and move down the carriages using all available space!

Niels, noticing the excitement of our poor friends and their seeming inability to do anything other than race around the platform at high speed, suggested that they might like to get into the carriage. This so incensed the electrons that they collided with each other with immense energy causing the utmost chaos on the platform.

Fearing for the safety of the other particles the announcer ordered the driver to close the doors and pull the train away without delay. Niels smiled as the electrons now calming down watched the walls of the tunnel passing by the windows.

As Presidents

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From The Times correspondent

This post has been obtained from an external source which does not permit its pages to be embedded here (at least Coco has not successfully found a way to do it), it has been necessary to take a suitably edited version of the original page to embed here. As a consequence updates made by the writer may not appear here. If you find anything that is different in a significant manner, please notify Coco using the comments section below. Thank you.